hey there :)

this is weird, posting again after so long. i highly doubt anyone comes here anyway, but whatever. like i care anymore.

ok, so i've been in aussieland for 7 months now. settling down nicely so far. haha i've made many new, wonderful friends, and people who i know i could confine in. its a feeling :) i feel that god's blessing has really been upon me and my family during this time, and i thank God for it. He's blessed us with a supportive community, wonderful friends, and a good school :)

but i still miss singapore alotalot, i miss DI, Spohia, 304... everyone who appreciated me for who i am.

i feel that alot of people are facing hard times in their lives, that they are struggling to stay afloat amidst their homework and their own and other's expectations for them. and then i feel guilty, having a relatively stress-free live here. i want to say, people, friends, i love you! God will always be with you, like he was for me, and he always loves you, and he will be your strength when you are weak! i will always love you i'll pray for you! :)

that's it for now, ciao!

nostalgia

too fast. way too fast.

its already sunday. and im leaving on wedesday.*sigh*

sometimes i really dont get life. true, things in life come and go, ppl come and go, even those you love the most... ppl who you can't bear to let go of. memories that we shared would be all that is left, things that you cling on to would eventually fade away.

i guess... evryone needs to say goodbye someday in thier life. i just hope that for all of us, my friends, Spohia, DI, everyone, that thiss will not be goodbye forever, but only for now, and see you soon!

i have no idea why i smile even wehn i am sad and depressed, why i laugh when i am supposed to be crying. sometimes i wonder how i am able to let go of everything io have here in Singapore. i guess its coz God's here with me, giving me comfort and taking away my tears.

as i look back at my past memories, i feel amazed at how everyone showed me so much love and concern when i am feeling down, in small little ways in my daily life.

it seems to me that i am only going back to the place that needs me, to the place that God has led me to. haha. evryone has to get out of thier comfort zone sooner or later. just that mine is sooner. :)

to the ppl whom i have met through out my 9~10 years in Singapore, to those whom i love, to those who love nme, and to those whom i considered 'just friends', i just want to say this: i will come back, one day. don't cry because i am gone, but smile that all this actually happened. that God brought me to know all you wonderful ppl. that we have meories to share, memories that i will always cherish.

moving is not easy on me, nor is it easy on my family. it is not easy on anyone, and it will never be easy. unless, of course, you are relly that cold-boolded. but to make it easier, don't think of it as me going away, but as me going out to impact the world, that i may truly become a Destiny Impacter!

don't worry for me, for God will always be with me. He will never leave us nor forsake us. He will always be there for us. i konw, coz i experianced it first. :)

as my time in Singapore draws to a close, i want to encourage everyone to continue to press on for God,and to glorify His name everyday!for i will be doing the same :)

no goodbye, but SEE YOU SOON! :)

don't cry because it is over, SMILE BECAUSE IT HAPPENED. :D

smile, and i will smile back at you.

Australia, here i come.

I have e-learing today. haha but thats not the point of this post.

for the first time in my life, i realized that time really does fly. like, FLY. i mean, look at the date right now. its already, what, 1st april? seems to me that only yesrerday i was still worring about my future. since then, 3 whole months have passed already. 3 months is a LONG time.

and now i sit here and ask myself: what have i actually done with my life so far?

i dont have much time left. we ALL dont have much tim left. in fact, we dont havr ANY time left at all. that means, we must start moving RIGHT NOW. i mean, come on, every day we live is a gift form God. yesterday will never keep coming.

3 months since i broke the news to u ppl. 3 months since i promised to myself, i will DEFINATELY be a part of DI's movement to have 100 souls planted by june.

boom, and rain starts falling. another of those sudden pours.

but what have i done so far? sure, i meant what i said back then, and i still mean it now.
as sudddenly as it had come, the rain stops.
but what have i been doing? when i look at my sister, even my classmates, i feel so bad within. that i lack the courage to go all out for God. taht i lack the will to do things for God, instead of the world. that i choose to keep my dignity above what God wants me to do.

there, i've said it all out. things that i never dared to admit, or to acknowledge.

whaat have i truly done with my life? now as i look back, i see many lost souls in need of a saviuor's love. and because i never really invested my time into saving souls, and getting girls who had come to DI before to come back, this time i lost all their numbers. and now i have no hope in contacting them again.

like i said, or rather typed, we never know what will happen tmr. i always thought i could do follow-ups the next day, later, whatever. then i lost my phone, and once again, the contacts werent the first thing i thought of.

im sorry, pearl. i let you, hongxia, eunice, and most of all, the whole of Sophia down. i always tried to hide everything away, to not let you know, and not to embarass myself. maybe you were able to see through the front i put up. maybe you saw this coming; maybe you didnt. i dont know how i can face you again, after you read this.

what should i do?

aiyah i know very long since i post liao. but i usually never post alot also mah...

i realized i need to update a bit. heh.

two weeks since school started. oh and by the way, i lost count of the number of days till my birthday. and i lazy to count again. so obviously, i stopped.

aiyah i nothing to type about already lah. will come back when i have news.

byes for now!

My Life

Will Never Be The Same Again.

i don't know.
i really don't know.

ok i know you peeps out there don't know what im talking about, but bear with me for a while. ty.

these few days before 2009 ends, my feelings have been very muddled. confusing. strange. whatever, just mixed. its almost as if... i don't dare to face the future... face 2010. some of my closer friends (Spohia) would know what is happening in my life right now, but i don't want to talk about it. not now, at least.

i almost feel afraid of the future, afraid of what is going to happen. which is, unfortunately, going to happen in 2010. which is why i'm trying to cling onto every second the is left of 2009...even though i know that time, must always go on. i feel as if... i never want 2010 to come. my mentality is, if 2009 never ends, 2010 can never come.

which is basically correct, actually.

but i still can't really face the future, and face what is going to happen in the near future. its only a matter of time.

i know that i've kept saying"leave it to God, trust in him" and stuff like that. not that i don't believe it, it's just that...
i'll miss all of you. i really will.

this is the time of my life that i need all the support i can get...and i know there are peeps out there, who love me, care for me, and... i love you too, SOPHIA!

i know God is also here for me...Joshua 1:5 says: i will NEVER leave you nor forsake you.

thank you, Lord!

you know what, Sophia... i feel like hugging you guys and crying on your shoulders again...this Thursday...when we meet... ...

thank you for always being here for me...

Post X-Factor

well... i guess its time to update already...

i know its such a long time since X-Factor camp ended... but i still miss it... the times we spent tgt, laughter, tears, joy, cheers, and so much more...

i never wanted to leave, never wanted it to end...

i enjoyed myself so much... it was the best camp of all time, God's presence was so strongly felt among us and in the camp..



yet so much things have happened. there was prayer meeting on thurs, Christmas service on fri, baptism on sat, then Sunday service...(though i nearly forgot abt Sunday service... met church ppl too much liao) then still have Yvonne's 18th birthday



and God was still able to work in my life...there's smth i want to share...

on thurs, i woke up late for prayer meeting (it was at 8am, for those who dont know). i was supposed to meet Sophia at 7am @ clementi for breakfast...and i woke up only at 6.18am. i managed to reach the bus stop at 6.30. actually could still be on time, but i kept worrying abt when the bus would come. worried all the way until 6.45, then i realised... God doesn't want us to worry abt anything! and we shouldn't worry cos everything is in His hands! and He is in control over everything! and guess what... the moment i stopped worrying, the bus came! HALEJLUYAH! Praise the Lord! some ppl may say its a coincidence, but i say, and i believe, that God caused it to happen and that he was with me all the time!



i learned smth very impt from this...

its the God doesn't want us to worry so much abt our future anymore! He wants us to just believe in Him, and to trust that He is always in control, and that nothing can ever go wrong!

whatever we may be facing right now, trust in God! for He is our good God, our mighty Saviour and Lord! our future is in His hands! He will always want the best for us; He will never give us what is second-best, but always the best! Praise God!



although we do not know what the future holds for us, right now what we have to do is just to believe God, trust in Him, and leave the rest up into His hands. even if smth that we don't like is going to happen (like school stuffs that interrupt an exciting camp), pray to God, believe in Him that He will change it, and have FAITH! have the child-like faith! no matter how late it is, God still answers prayers!



and this reminds me. rmb the recording i was supposed to have on the 21st? i prayed, and i never gave up, i kept believing! and guess what? it got cancelled! even though i got to know of it quite late, my prayers still got answered! and i was able to enjoy the camp to the full! Praise God! Thank You Jesus!



FOR THROUGH YOU, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!



HALEJLUYAH!



never, ever stop believing. i hpoe this post can be a source of encouragement to you guys (and gals, of course!) out there, reading my blog. always rmb: with God, NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!


P.S. i want to upload a vid leh... but dunno how.. help?